How Emotions Influence Behaviour: The Power of Acknowledgement

Ever sent an email too hastily? Or potentially over-reacted in a situation after which you regret?

Have you ever sent an email you later regretted? Or snapped at a colleague only to wonder why you reacted so strongly? These moments often stem from emotions working behind the scenes of our behaviour. Let's explore why this happens and - more importantly - how to prevent it.

Try This Now (just 30 Seconds)

Take a deep breath and ask yourself: "What emotion am I feeling right now?" Don't judge it - just notice it. You've just taken your first step in emotional awareness!

Emotions shape our decisions, impact our actions, and even influence how others perceive us. When we feel a strong emotion, it often propels us to act in specific ways - whether it's joy driving us to celebrate, anger prompting confrontation, or fear leading us to avoid certain situations. But what happens when these emotions go unacknowledged? They may start controlling us from the background, subtly influencing our behaviours in ways we might not even realise.

Real-World Example

Some weeks ago, a client shared how they almost sent a strongly worded email to their team after a project setback. By pausing to identify their emotions (frustration and fear of falling behind), they chose to schedule a collaborative problem-solving meeting instead. The result? Solutions emerged that actually strengthened the team.

Imagine a day at work where you’re feeling frustrated, but you’re unaware of it. This frustration may show up in your tone of voice, your body language, or even the words you choose, potentially causing friction with colleagues. When we don’t take a moment to recognise our emotions, they can “leak” into our behaviours, affecting our interactions and outcomes.

Quick Check-In

Think about your last challenging interaction at work. What emotion were you feeling? How did it influence your behaviour?

Recognising Emotion-Driven Patterns

Emotions often drive behaviour patterns, some of which may be constructive, while others can hinder our goals. Acknowledging emotions in the moment is crucial because it creates space for us to respond mindfully rather than react automatically. For example:

• Frustration might lead us to withdraw or react impulsively.

• Fear can cause avoidance of certain tasks or conversations.

• Excitement might make us more willing to take risks or explore new ideas.

  
  

Bringing emotions into conscious awareness allows us to choose our response rather than be at the mercy of our feelings.

Watch out for these common traps:

• Trying to suppress emotions instead of acknowledging them

• Rushing to action without the "Pause" step

• Confusing similar emotions (e.g., anxiety vs. excitement)

• Forgetting to check in with yourself during busy periods

Practical Strategy: Pause, Identify, and Choose

A simple yet powerful technique for recognising and managing emotions before they impact behaviour is the "Pause, Identify, and Choose" method:

Pause Identify Choose

Step 1: Pause

When you notice yourself reacting strongly, take a moment to pause.

💡 Tip: Use physical cues like taking three deep breaths to make pausing automatic.

Step 2: Identify

Acknowledge the emotion you're feeling. You can refer to Dr. Robert Plutchik's Wheel of Emotions to pinpoint the specific feeling.

💡 Tip: Notice where you feel the emotion in your body—this physical awareness helps with identification.

Step 3: Choose

Decide how you want to respond. What action or words would best serve you in this situation?

💡 Tip: Ask yourself, "What would my best-self do in this situation?"

This technique is especially useful in high-stakes situations, such as a difficult meeting or a challenging conversation. By pausing and identifying your feelings, you're better equipped to respond with intention and clarity.

Emotional Influence in Professional and Leadership Contexts

In professional settings, unacknowledged emotions can subtly steer our actions and even affect our leadership presence. High Emotional Intelligence (EQ) involves recognising these emotional influences, both in ourselves and others. Leaders with high EQ are often better equipped to handle complex social dynamics, fostering environments where their teams feel respected and understood.

Before vs. After Emotional Awareness

Before	After
Immediately responding to a critical email with defensiveness	Pausing to identify the hurt behind the defensiveness, then crafting a constructive response
Avoiding difficult conversations with team members	Acknowledging the underlying anxiety and preparing for meaningful dialogue

When we are aware of our emotions, we’re less likely to make impulsive decisions, ensuring that our actions align with our values and goals. By tuning into our emotional landscape, we empower ourselves to be the drivers of our behaviour, fostering resilience, self-control, and empathy.

Your Next Step

Choose one situation today where you'll practice the "Pause, Identify, and Choose" method. Perhaps it's before checking your email, entering a meeting, or having a difficult conversation. Notice what changes when you bring awareness to your emotions.

Reflection Questions:

• When have you successfully navigated an emotion-driven situation?

• What technique worked best for you?

• How did increased emotional awareness change the outcome?

  
  

Share your experience in the comments below - your insights might help others on their emotional awareness journey.

In our next post, we'll explore a fascinating approach called Emotion Coaching, which uses these techniques to guide people through their emotional experiences, helping them cultivate resilience and emotional intelligence.

Continue Exploring

If you’re new to this series, I invite you to revisit our first two posts for a deeper understanding of emotions and their impact:

1. “The Evolution of Emotions: From Survival Instincts to Self-Growth” - Explore the origins and evolutionary role of emotions in human development.

2. “What Are Emotions? A Closer Look at Their Purpose and Power” - Discover how understanding the structure of emotions can empower us to harness them for growth and resilience.

These insights lay the groundwork for our current exploration into how emotions shape behaviour, helping us build a toolkit for more intentional, emotionally aware actions.